When the last of New York’s coin-operated automats closed its doors in 1991, it was met with some nostalgia, but no great sorrow. By that time, the idea of eating a chicken pot pie from a vending machine seemed pretty gross. Back in the day, though, it was all the rage. When Horn & Hardart, America’s first chain of automats, opened its doors near Union Square in the summer of 1912, it transformed the way Americans ate, by offering them a ‘fast-food’ option. By the mid-‘20s, the automat, featured in musicals, frequented by Hollywood actors, and forever memorialized in a Hopper painting, had become a major part of pop culture. 

Last month, the automat returned to Manhattan. Given the name BAMN!, the hot-pink, standing-room-only space on St. Marks is an updated, semi-Asian variation of the original. Opened by restaurant newcomers David Leong and Robert Kwak, who enlisted Chef Kevin Reilly of The Water Club after he reportedly answered a Craigslist ad for the best croquette recipe, it offers a variety of vending-machine goodies from hot dogs and grilled cheese to teriyaki burgers and roasted pork buns. Nothing is over $2.50 in quarters (they provide a change-machine) -- and drinks, ice cream and Belgian frites, which come with a choice of 30 different dipping sauces, can be purchased at the counter. Given the fact that it’s open 24 hours a day, BAMN! might just be the best 2am drunken pitstop in NYC. 

“It’s cheap, it’s quick, it’s pink – you can’t go wrong with pink – it rocks,” says Jimmy Webb, manager of the punk-rock retail institution Trash & Vaudeville, located right across the street. Oddly, though, until we brought him a bag-load of BAMN! food to road-test, he had yet to try it out. Here, Webb, a vegetarian with an apparent fine palette, offers his critique: 

On the Peanut Butter & Jelly Croquettes:“PB& J rocks – it’s all-American. This one is awesome. It’s like a normal sandwich, but toasted. It kinda tastes like grandma made it.” 

On the Belgian Fries and Wasabi Mayo:“The fries rock. The sauce – I love it. Wasabi is awesome when you have a cold.”

On the Spam Musubi:“I don’t even want to touch it. It doesn’t even smell okay. Spam sushi? I don’t think so. It weighs a ton too. Feel it. It’s like the kind of food you find in a ghetto – a white man’s ghetto upstate. It’s totally nuts. Andy Warhol should have painted it.”

On the Mozzarella Sticks:“These are no better or worse than what you get anywhere else. Warm and toasty. Total classic.”

On the Grilled Cheese:“It tastes like the regular old grilled cheese you get at Dojo’s.”

On the Mac & Cheese Croquette:“This is an odd idea. It’s totally a drunk’s food. It tastes better than Kraft’s, but it’s probably very constipating. It’s like low-budget grandma’s.”

On the Japanese Doughnuts:“This looks like a greaseball. It tastes just like fried dough. It’s one of those things where one is okay, two will make you sick.”

On the Roasted Pork Buns:“It looks good, but I won’t eat it cuz it’s pork.”

On the Hot Dog:“I can’t eat this either, but I appreciate the croissant-like Pillsbury bun. It looks like the food at Tupperware parties. Not that I go to Tupperware parties, but I’ve seen the food.”

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Get It:

BAMN!, 37 St Marks Place (btwn 2nd & 3rd Aves), NYC; (212) 358-7685; bamnfood.com

Trash & Vaudeville, 4 St. Marks Place (212) 982-3590

Photos and video by Alisa Gould-Simon