Dear PsychoDoc: I’ve always been a fan of badly-acted porn, but lately I’ve been getting the urge to get a little more ‘hands-on’, so to speak. While having sex with my girlfriend, I suggested that we should make some of our own home-made porn. I also told her that my ultimate fantasy would be to see her getting it on with another girl while I film it. Her reaction wasn’t exactly ‘positive’. She threw away all my DVDs (even the ones that weren’t porn!) and I’ve been sleeping on the couch for the past week. How can I make her come around to my way of thinking?
-James, 21, London-

Dear Freaky and Frustrated: Dude, first of all, I’ve got to hand it to you; way to go for having the guts to say that to your girlfriend! You sound like you’ve got balls and I admit that! But, that said, I have to ask: is this your first relationship? The only reason I ask that is because it sounds like you haven’t had much experience with women.

Porn is a very touchy and volatile subject. You get some women who love nothing more than watching full-on porn, but for every one of those, there are inevitably many who are repulsed to the point of barfing. Your girl sounds like she probably threw up all over the bed sheets when you suggested making amateur porn.

Have you guys ever watched porn together? If she was disgusted at the thought of watching it, what would make you think that she’d suddenly turn into a porn star and get it on with another girl for you and your handy-cam? You gotta break her in slowly. Put on some of that super-soft-core porn where they don’t show any private parts and there’s more talking than actual sex. The one with pleasant music playing in the background, rather than a lone ‘80s synthesizer. Women generally connect sex with emotion, so this is a great start. If she gets into that, then you can suggest that maybe you and she could make your own ‘special love story’ (don’t ever call it ‘porn’).

It’s all about selling the fantasy – who knows, if she gets comfortable with it, she might give the go-ahead for that ‘special love story’ to get truly X-rated…

PsychoDoc is written by Donald Crunk, also known as Styleslut. He is not a medically-trained doctor or shrink, but is a highly-trained professional in life. He can be reached at psychodoc@psychopedia.com.

The Goods:
www.xtube.com to easily click on a variety of porn flavours, from gay to straight, front to back! Well-organized and free. Some soft-core there, though this is mostly the wham-bang stuff.